The Wells of Sadness

The wells of sadness

fill you up

with all the thoughts

‘you are not enough’

and all the times

when life was tough

and what you did

and who you were

was more than less

you ever wanted,

less was more

than you could handle

and in your heart

you felt the downward spiral.

No-one ever saw you sink

as you just kept going

without a blink

onwards

upwards

pushing on

never saying what you felt

letting everyone

ride your pony

when deep inside

you were so lonely.

Lonely feelings

in lonely hours

and all the while

you kept on smiling

‘do your best

just keep going’,

no-one likes a sad old face

just keep going

you’ll win the race.

You’ll get to where

you think you’re going

you’ll find the way

the signs are showing

and deep inside

you do your best,

but rewards are few

when you past the test.

You’re empty of the love you need,

you’ve gone through life

at another speed.

You got all A’s

but truly now

you feel the haze

of where you went

and how you felt

and disappoint is within

that you worked yourself

like it all mattered,

when deep within

you felt so shattered.

Tired and tight,

dark, not bright,

do your best

keep it quiet,

stay at home in your hermit’s life…

I like alone time,

it’s calm and quiet.

No one rattles,

no one shouts,

I am not pushed

or thrown about.

I have my old friend

and life is fine

and so am I

but why inside

do I still cry?

I cry because

I do keep quiet,

I write my verses

and express with light

but in the night

I cough and choke

and wonder where

my soul will find

the secret yearning of my heart.

Oh Love myself

that’s where I start.

Let my voice be heard,

let my heart just sing

with all the joy

the flowers bring,

the fragrant rooms,

the stillness now,

breathe in peace

and rest your stress,

just be yourself,

do not push and strain

love yourself to the core….

God knows how good

that would be

to bring you light

and help you see

That all you ever need my love,

is to accept yourself and know,

love is deeper than the sadness well,

so lighten up and prepare to tell.

Share your soul

with your heart

and healing comes

with the blessed start.

Tell them all how you feel

being kind, is being real.

Part 1 written July 25, 2012 in the depths of illness from whooping cough)

The wells of sadness

fill up when

you think of now

and think of then

and all the while

remembering

how it was

and who you were

and whether much has changed

on looking back

on the road

or off the track.

And now you travel

off the track,

the road less travelled

leads you on

to life with joy

being light and strong.

Blessings surround you

everyday

and healing shows

in many ways

and though the challenges

have been intense

and everyday in every way

your light is brighter

and you hear us say

“keep on going through the light

and all your blessings

are beaming bright

and your love is

showing through

love yourself

begin anew.”

(Part 2 This was written July 26, 2012 when I was still dreadfully sick with whooping cough!)

I wrote these verses 10 months ago whilst I was in the dark night of my soul experience.

I am ever so grateful I am happy now with much more joyful feeling in my everyday life. May 31, 2013