Tell Me One More Time

I took this photo on September 26, 2024 

as I was playing one of my favorite songs,

on endless repeat and singing,

and also had been writing an eulogy,

in retrospect, for my Dad and Mum.

And yes it was 2 days before Kris died,

in his home in Hawaii, on September 28, 2024.

He was 88 years old.

So I was bringing us altogether

one more time, like the old days.

And next day I was playing 'This Old Road",

another in that trilogy of albums,

the other being "Feeling Mortal".

The framed poster

of Kris Kristofferson with his guitar at the 2008

Live At The Olympia Theater- Dublin, Ireland,

is one of my collection, and came with the CD

'Closer To The Bone'.

It has the lyrics which are rolling on the rhyme.

So brilliant and quintessentially Kris, 

and why I repeatedly love singing with the album.

'Tell Me One More Time',

 is title of song by Kris Kristofferson.

 

I have been buying and playing his albums since 1971,

and do listen very often so I know all the lyrics.

I saw him solo live in concert in Adelaide in 2019.

Here are some words written yesterday on abc.com.au

"As with so many of Kristofferson's songs,

he whispers in your ear from some kind of warm

and transcendent philosophical place, 

offering comfort, perspective,

and the possibility of hope when all is lost.

'For The Good Times',

is a masterclass in empathy and simplicity,

being able to capture

the most complex angle on the human condition,

all with a few well-placed words.

I'll be listening to these songs forever."- Henry Wagons

 

Blessings, peace, truth, freedom and big-hearted Love,

will live on for The Pilgrim.

My heart is deeply grateful for all his creativity 

and deep soul expression.

Love Bee xo

 

Blue Light And Blue Skies

Today your Lilac

is gloriously blooming

in the sky above your small grave.

As I walk by many times,

all the gnomes are always present

while little pixie friends play.

 

I reached some flowers.

See them here for you.

Butterflies now grace our garden

as golden dandelions shine,

I see you resting in the violet leaves

of where you came to be.   

 

There is blue light with me at night

as I lie in a warm bed

listening to blackbirds singing in the dark,

calling the dawn of morning.

 

My heart is with you Bobby, and the lilacs.

This is my 700th post to Come Blossom Come Fruit.

When I started here in August 2012 Poppy, my Italian Greyhound

was with me constantly, so, in my deep grief,

many lovely verses came to me when she died

in early September 2013.

 

 

 

 

How Did The Doves Nest Just Arrive?

I breathe

I grieve.

Yesterday I think of nests,

garden birds landing beside me

as I stand among the flowers

blessing your little body in the soil,

feeling slow, as I ponder where to plant alyssum

and wonder when

I will have more able strength

to do what helps me sing and everything.

Twas from last Autumn to this current Spring,

the trees came down,

the flowering creeper went away

and I found myself 

grieving their loss and mine.

Now your love of sunshine

heartens me on this cold day

as blue skies above

brighten our little flowers with the gnomes.

Something happened overnight,

or with a magpie's flight,

as an empty very feathered nest

is resting in the violet leaves.

It is a sign that things appear

even though no tree is near,

it has joined your graveside place

and the birds are with me

as they were with you

when warm sunshine shines through.

 

(Written September 16, 2024)

 
 

'We Grow By Delays'

Decades ago he said to you:

"Finish it all, I didn't do."

and now I wonder what that was to mean

is there some understanding I am to gleam

from this peculiar dream.

 

And just before I heard that comment,

I heard him say again to you

"The doctor's advice came true"

when he said to the man

"Get a dog you understand."

These snippets of a life,

where his often perplexing misunderstandings

kept his body anguished by the confusion

of crossing intersections,

needless to know

misconceptions

of where to head or where to go.

 

Pondering the circles of indecision,

looking down at his feet

rather than the landscape vision

he could complete

and happily travel and sometime meet

new opportunities.

 

When loitering is helpful

and meandering is a pleasant path, 

wisdom shows "We grow by delays".

So we know

by going back to look again,

dreams may then flow

to let blocked emotions go.

"We grow by delays" is a quote by the author of

"The Cloud Of Unknowing" (see my previous post 

September 21, 2024)

Photo credit: Nigella, flower seeds for sale

Lambley Nursery, Ascot, Victoria, Australia

 

Finish It All I Didn't. What?

I heard him say :

in conversation to his friend 55 years ago,

in his own tone of weary resignation:

 

"Finish it all I didn't. I didn't finish it at all" 

 

And then yesterday I found a quote 

 

"As the author of 'The Cloud of Unknowing' states it

"We grow by delays",

and for this reason the later expressions

of our plans are often

more productive and meaningful

than they could possibly have been at the earlier time".

 

"It is a question of the appropriate moment."

 

Quote from Ira Progoff, in his book

'At A Journal Workshop".

Dialogue House Library, 1975

Dear Friends,

It is all so healing and inspiring

to be now working with current dreams and inner wisdom,

and to find new possibility in this Now momentum,

many long decades later. In my wisdom years!

I thought my dreams of past months were in code,

and now I see creative fulfillment blossoming.

How astounding.

All of nature has laws and codes.

 

Blessings and love,

Bee

Photo credit: Lambley Nursery Garden,

Ascot, Victoria, Australia. Autumn 2024

 

Tulips and Bluebells

Things come and things go

people come and people go

days come and days go

so now, gloriously

creative gentleness is here to see,

tulips, bluebells, seeds, flowers, bees and trees.

 

Photo credit: Lambley Nursery, Spring gardens, 2024

Ascot, Victoria, Australia
 

As All Beauty Blooms

Now just walking by I see

your blooming glory showing me

everywhere I look this day

I witness spontaneity at play

so as I go along my way

everything shines today.

 

It is that nature has her time

where buds are growing 

as elsewhere flowers fade,

or are too long in the shade

so potential fragrance wafts away.

 

Some years her flowers stay bright for days

but in present time

the wind has come suddenly,

so now we wait a year

for annual flowering to reappear.

 

Each open bloom is only brief,

in life plants grow new leaves

to welcome the coming warmth of summer

when tomorrow presents differently

our loitering becomes possibility.

Photo: Bee Porteous, Vibernum carlessi, in my garden,

September, Spring 2024

 

"Immortality" by Clare Harner 1934

Do not stand


          By my grave, and weep.
     

I am not there,
          

I do not sleep—


I am the thousand winds that blow


I am the diamond glints in snow


I am the sunlight on ripened grain,


I am the gentle, autumn rain.


As you awake with morning’s hush,


I am the swift, up-flinging rush


Of quiet birds in circling flight,


I am the day transcending night.


     Do not stand


          By my grave, and cry—


     I am not there,


          I did not die.
— Clare Harner, The Gypsy, December 1934

Above is the version published in The Gypsy of December 1934

(page 16), under the title "Immortality" 

and followed by the author's name and location:

"CLARE HARNER, Topeka, Kan."[1]: 424 

The indentation and line breaks are as given there. 

 

Photo taken: Bee Porteous, 1.09pm, August 19, 2024.

Delicate, open bell-shaped pink flowers Azelea/Rhododendron

'Abundance of Beauty' -

'A beauty that blossoms abundantly and without reserve'. 

"Flowers and Their Messages" - The Mother

Treasures For Faith and Harmony

My tiny shadow lies beside me,

a small baby,

contained in a decorative lace bassinet,

so far away from familiar faces,

no places for me to see their smiles

as I am fostered miles from home

and this was then when

I lost the bonds of all I knew to be true.

 

I cling to soft ribbons and lace

I cannot swim, I never do,

I only float and hope

I will be found safe and sound.

Venus in Libra led me through

to my deep affinity with unusual containers

as safe places for treasures, feathers,

baskets holding fallen nests,

seed pods and bells,

gemstones and pebbles from wild places

in carved wooden bowls,

or in tin, or timber trunks,

storing Raku with gifts from you.

Almost all my containers

do contain more containers,

and somewhere within me

lives all faith and harmony,

knowing that what is tucked inside,

a floral or painted box

will be, found eventually.

I see these as places of safe-keeping

almost every thing will live anew with you

or 'who-ever-new, finds what is 'left behind'.

 
 

Some Spring Is Springing

Flowing, growing, glowing, 

knowing, showing,

showering, flowering:

 

Oh Joy, I see a few new blooms

rising from the frosted soil.

They do it simply,

ever so quietly,

until two are peeping through,

so I see, these blue early signs

our winter will subside one day

as sunshine lights our way.
 

Some spring is springing
It’s about waiting and watching.

It’s about beginning and believing,

or believing and beginning.

It is knowing the soil will help the bulbs.

The rain will help the bulbs,

the sun will help the bulbs,

until one cold morning,

up will pop!! the beautiful flowers,

then more little bulbs,

keep on growing further on up the hill,

like a family always knowing,

Life blooms many times over, Roses to Clover....
 

I find Winter-Spring flowering bulbs

one of the simple joys of life.

 

Sweet joy to each of you 

Love Bee xo

My Love

I asked myself 9 days ago

What is my best way to Be now?

 

And this revelation came to me at 4.09am:

 

"I now know to Be my own true love."

 

Bobby

Bobby Sweetheart,

this is one of my lovely pictures of you,

with your shining heart beaming through,

so much so, the vet always said,

when we thought it was the end,

"He's got a strong heart.

He wants to stay, he is happy with you,

so keep taking care of him"

In this photo Bobby was cradled in my lap

and we shared love and play for 9 weeks more.

With love to all for your gentle thoughts,

Blessings,

Bee and Bobby xoxo

 

 

 

Noticing Quiet Things

This winter glow

brings quiet things

rarely noticed

but deeply felt as caring gifts

thankfully received

and continually cherished in my deepest heart.

 

Grace, peaceful blessings and deep serenity

to all, Love Bee xo
 

Lighting Our Way

 

Sweet love of mine, what joy I have

I am most glad to see you

dressed in pearly white this full moon night.

Shall we dance, sweet jonquil,

shall we sing quietly

shall the stillness bring us through.

The years of tears

are gently taken to heaven to rise again

and fall with the spring rain,

when time has passed and our hearts are lifted

with the artistry of daffodils

blooming on the grassy hills.

 

These Jonquils are chosen with fondest love

for my Dad, my Mum and my best friend, Bobby

who passed away,

in separate years, in the morning of July 5.

One Day Before Yesterday

 

One day before yesterday

you gently passed away.

Your soul left in a second, 

so your glorious running, playing,

eating and now sleeping body is resting.

 

Yet, still I see you playing 'chasey'

or in your favorite tunnel nest

under the old lilac tree

with your toys and pixies

peeping through the strappy leaves

where tall blue lilies will always be.

Us always walking around together,

picking posies and sniffing flowers will be

my happiest memory.

Little Bobby Sweetheart,

everyone loved your super happy smile,

your joy, your play will always stay,

as your deeply gentle fondness

was shining brightly every day.

 

Best friends from the start,

Bobby, you will always be in my heart.

Always in my heart.

Bobby - November 2010 to July 5, 2024

 

I Lay The Past To Rest

There were different roads that I chose to go

and some long ways in another direction

but always, then came an intersection

with a higher way to take that day

and the next, until I found the best path yet. 

 

Not at all easy.

Some days my bones are going slow

so life it brings Simplicity.

I find Joy at the start of every path

back to the beginning.

 

Long ago, when I walked a different way

I shaved skin off my shinbone

I mostly felt all alone

misunderstood

so I did Tai chi among the trees

I walked home alone in the dark

yes for me,

some very contradictory ways to be.

 

I walked and walked,

I worked late shifts, up and down

ten city storeys in a time of little glory

when I could only just pay the rent but I went

bush-walking every morning.

 

I have taken inspiration on outback tracks

I have planted sunflowers in my country field

I have learned from relationships

I have looked to sea

the wide skyline of anchored tankers:

raw-iron-ore going nowhere.

 

So times were not easy to forget.

I was lost in a crowded place

I was invaded in my own space

Maybe I hide in plain sight

I have walked so many paths

I have bundled sticks along the fence

so little lizards hide in them.

Yes I could start a fresh.

So no longer looking back,

I find this track to stroll along.

Just following the flight of birds

and the whispering grass I have always heard.

 

I walk where the trees talk with me. 

I find The Simple Path is my way,

so life is ever so much better this very day.

 

July 1, 2024

 

 

Little Sparrow Oh So Cold So Cold

I heard the little sparrow say today:

You cried when I was still alive
you cried when I died of hypothermia

I will remember you with your warm hand

around my cold feathered body.

You tenderly breathed all warmth to me

as for a time my eyes were open.

Now again, we fly free with apricity*.

*Apricity

- warmth of winter sun on back - or face

- from 1600 

- a gardener's word, chirped by a little bird!!

 

These Precious Feathers

I saw your gentle peace

each day we passed through,

so this quiet picture of a beautiful you

now rising to higher skies,

calls me to bless

your precious feathers left behind.

 

Turtle Dove,

you lived here with your family,

resting in the garden and nesting in the trees.

I know you flew on to live anew.

Still I cry as I softly bury you.

I cry as I bury you.